SCAM ALERT: Boss Up Your Life With Alicia Walsh

You probably landed here because you searched on Google wondering if ‘Boss Up Your Life With Alicia Walsh’ is a scam. Well heres some non-surprising news, of course its a fucking scam you fucking un-educated, lowlife idiot. Alicia Walsh continues to sell dreams to the most vulnerable people in our communities, and when ‘you’ don’t get the promised returns, she blames it on you, that you didn’t work hard enough. Alicia Walsh has scammed everyone from teenagers, to the elderly and sadly, her own family. She continues to scam people…

New scientific study suggests using marijuana could lead to homosexuality

A scientific study by Dr. Dicken Mybutt suggests that not only does marijuana affect a person’s sexual experience but could lead to homosexuality. He claims his new study found that men who smoked marijuana were more likely to find other men attractive. Dr. Dicken Mybutt began his study on marijuana use and its side effects after he lost his wallet and had no money to pay his drug dealer. His drug dealer made him a deal, and he found himself giving his drug dealer oral sex. Dr. Dicken Mybutt claims…

New neighbours must own a cake store or something

Brad and Judy Lanetti awoke to quite a pleasant surprise this morning when they discovered that their new neighbours are a group of bakers, or something. It was Judy who suggested this after recognising the whipped cream canisters peppering the lawn, as before retiring Judy too was a baker. After a heavy night of partying and thumping music coming from their neighbour’s direction, the Lanetti’s were especially impressed that the neighbours were able to get up and bake what appears to be over 100 cakes. “We thought they were just…

Auckland Uber driver admits to being forced into anal sex with four clients to keep his five-star rating

An Auckland Uber driver has decided to go public after being forced to perform sexual acts on four passengers who threatened to rob him of his perfect five-star ranking. Rajesh Samayamantri Venkata, an engineering student at the University of Auckland, has decided to go public over his sexual assault in an effort to warn other potential victims of the possible abuses of Uber passengers. Rajesh released a video on his YouTube channel detailing the horrifying details of his abuse by four passengers who threatened to destroy his perfect five-star Uber ranking if…

Government admits renaming CYF’s to Oranga Tamariki was because they deal with more Maori families than Pakeha

The name has caused backlash from the public, industry experts, and even the United Nations – the government today finally admitted the real reason they chose the name Oranga Tamariki, is because they deal with more Maori families. It was all the back on July 28, 2016 it was reported a new Ministry for Vulnerable Children would take over from the chequered Child, Youth and Family from April 2017. The following month Social Development Minister Anne Tolley confirmed the name: Ministry for Vulnerable Children, Oranga Tamariki. I like to think of it like this… Inland…

Scientists have confirmed women who say “New Year New Me” will still be thots In 2020

Scientists have finally confirmed that women who use the popular end of the year phrase “New Year New Me”, in fact, will remain to be thots in 2020 and possibly forever. They have confirmed it’s genetic. Researchers firmly believe the number of thots will increase due to “public figures” on Instagram and other social media platforms. We asked scientist Richard Jackson what about Public Figures and models on Instagram and he said “Public Figures? really lets just call it what it is Thotism” — he continued be saying this thot problem…

Canada legalizes medicinal cocaine

Canada became the first Western country to legalize the medicinal use of cocaine today. In a close 158-150 vote the House of Commons passed the Drug Policy Modernization Act (DPMA) ,which allows doctors to prescribe the drug to treat various medical ailments. The Public Health Agency of Canada recommended passage of the bill, arguing that cocaine has a long tradition of medical use that modern science has unfairly ignored. It especially made the case that the powerful stimulant is useful for treating mental health disorders. “Depression is no match for…

Criminal foils the GCSB by entering private mode on browser

An eight-month investigation into con-man and arms dealer James Matthew has been foiled this week, as Matthew cleared his history on his HP Omen Laptop before disappearing into cyber space by entering the private mode on Google Chrome. Gone without a trace, theGCSB have been left scrambling for any signs of Matthew’s possibly illegal activities. A hack into his personal mobile phone was declared futile, as Matthew had been deleting his text messages as they came in. “He’s a goddamn genius, always ten steps ahead,” says Inspector Chris Astley, head…

Flea and tick vaccine rendered millions of cats autistic claims venetian

A world-renowned veterinarian and feline specialist claims that he discovered an indisputable link between the Feline Autism Syndrome and the cat flea vaccine. Dr. Andrew Singer, director of the Royal Veterinary College of the University of London, revealed the results of an 11-year study implicating over 85,000 cats, in a press conference this morning. According to Dr. Singer, researchers were able to demonstrate a direct and undeniable link between animals being vaccinated against fleas and ticks and them developing autism. “Not all cats who got the vaccines became autistic, but…