A word from old mate Sir Bob Jones

The news from Sydney that the Fairfax Board has declined the best offer they could solicit for Stuff’s newspaper fleet, namely $50m, came as a surprise. They’re out of touch and should have grabbed it, tee-heeing as they fled that there’s one born every minute. For who would be dumb enough to want to buy such rapidly dwindling in value assets? Further evidence of their lack of touch is the hint that they may try to float the company, perhaps inspired by the constant moaning by our sharemarket writers about…

Vinny Eastwood – Woke or Mentally Retarded?

Jesus fucking Christ, I just wasted an hour of my time listening to New Zealand ‘journalist’ Vinny Eastwood. It is safe to say my IQ has just decreased by 39. I watched a YouTube video from ‘The Webster Report’ hosted by Paul Webster with ‘special’ guest Vinny Eastwood from the Vinny Eastwood Show! Here are a couple of points I have recorded Vinny Eastwood is a guest on The Webster Report yet doesn’t let the host speak – he steals the whole show. Vinny Eastwood interupts Paul at least 90%…

NZ Media having a great time terrorizing elderly Springfield Café owners

Two of New Zealand’s most ‘respected’ and ‘honest’ news outlets are having a fucking field day with their constant articles on Springfield Store and Cafe owners Donald and Karyn Cullingford. Stuff and The New Zealand Herald have teamed to hurl a constant flow of abuse at the elderly owners of the “friendliest cafe in New Zealand” and have forced them into hiding. The Springfield Store and Cafe, on the western edge of the Canterbury Plains – the last spot to grab a feed before Arthur’s Pass – made headlines after…

A guide on how to become a Oranga Tamariki social worker

Oranga Tamariki—Ministry for Uplifting Children are on a journey to ensure that all Māori tamariki belong and are part of a loving Pakeha whānau. Oranga Tamariki is leading social work practice that is state-centered, trauma inducing and non-effective for all Māori parents. As a Social Worker, you will have an opportunity to change the lives of young people and their whānau, for the worse. Using the latest weakness-based practice tools and assessment frameworks; you will work hard to get quality outcomes for tamariki and rangatahi. Oranga Tamariki uses a lot…

Undercover operation finds suspect shits in the shower

Undercover operations which were conducted by the GCSB, Five Eyes and NZ Police over a year on certain individuals in New Zealand found one suspect guilty of shitting in the shower. The operation took a turn for the worse when one of the undercover agents left the shower with ‘mud’ on the soles of his feet. After forensic testing at an ESR laboratory, results came back that it was not indeed soil or mud, but human feces. The operation which cost the tax payer more than $250,000 left operatives with…

Book review – Go Fuck Yourself, Cunt by David Seymour

Politicians are the second least trusted profession, just barely ahead of the journalists who report on them. Even the used car salesmen and lawyers are being rehabilitated compared with politicians. No wonder John Key achieved political superstardom by effectively saying “I’ll keep those other muppets out and then I won’t change anything.” But what if politicians could solve real problems, and were prepared to set out their solutions in a book? introducing David Seymour’s new book – Go Fuck Youself, Cunt. This book is filled with fresh new ideas. Deep…

If Kangen Water is so good for your health why are the presenter’s obese?

If you have been lurking around Facebook for the last year or so, there is probably a good chance you have come past a post in a group in regards to that Wai Warriors Kangen Water MLM scam. The presenters of this multi level marketing scam often spam groups with terribly designed flyers which look like they were made in Microsoft Word 98. They invite people to a ‘once in a lifetime’ opportunity and try sell them an overpriced dream. The Kangen Water presenters always seem to look like 3rd…

Fuck Facebook and Mark Zuckerberg too

So much passes for ‘news’ these days that I’m not surprised the purists are up in arms over Facebook. In fact you don’t even have to be a purist to see Facebook for what it is. It’s certainly not a ‘news’ site. It’s a hive of NZ Herald clickbait and Stuff bullshit and seemingly a platform not remotely interested in decency, honesty or indeed, news. Mark Zuckerberg’s snubbing of Jacinda Ardern’s recent Paris summit or “Christchurch Call”, told us about all we needed to know about how many ‘Fuck’s Facebook…

Missing The Jeremy Kyle Show? Here’s 5 other ways to sneer at people

The Jeremy Kyle Show was a lot of things to a lot of people. It was an easily-produced, inexpensive piece of television that drew large audiences. It was an easy way to feel good about yourself by sneering at the participants, a smorgasbord of usually working class people, offered the chance to be on TV in exchange for all the gory details of their love lives, family feuds and failings as human beings. With the JK Show currently on hiatus due to what is being described by insiders as ‘technical…

Cocaine: How much is too much?

A morning line of cocaine is an essential for Kiwi workers looking to kick start the daily grind. But although the humble cocke is a vital feature of our working day, the pros and cons of snorting coke have been debated for decades. Now, new research from the University of South Australia has, for the first time, put a limit on safe cocaine consumption and cardiovascular health. Snorting six or more lines a day can be detrimental to your health, increasing your risk of heart disease by up to 22…