Freedom camper fined $400 after being photographed wearing Croc’s

When Carolyn Johnston saw a freedom camper putting on some strange looking beach shoes and wandering down to the beach, she couldn’t resist a “perfect opportunity”.  Johnston followed the international visitor to a rocky patch where she took a picture of her with her pants down while wearing Crocs. “I was just that mad. Just wild,” said Johnston, a member of the New Zealand Motor Caravan Association (NZMCA).   “Don’t wear Crocs in our country.” The drama unfolded at Little Waikawau Reserve, along Thames Coast, which requires all freedom campers to wear suitable footware, not…

Trolls matter! Introducing Roasted Kai

Roasted Kai was inspired by people getting kicked out of Facebook groups for trolling, or groups having too many rules. Trolls matter yet they are blocked & muted because they are truthfully opinionated where its needed. Why be nice and kind if you don’t mean it. Trolls deserve a say too that’s where Roasted Kai come in. Its a place where you can simply put the feet up and be yourself (a real cunt) and socialise without a single care in the world for the other cunt. In the real…

Maori Party to sign up for unemployment benefit

After a hilarious defeat at last year’s election, the Māori Party has admitted the tagging is on the wall and has signed up for the Unemployment Benefit. What began in hope 14 years ago has been reduced to a few dozen die-hard Māori Party members presiding over a living funeral. It’s not that there isn’t any work for the Maori Party, it’s just that the Maori Party will not work. Who ordered sushi for the Māori Party? Māori Party open to everyone but ‘damn Pakehas’ Māori Party smacks mouthy wife…

Woman gives birth to black child; blames coffee her husband drinks

With news trickling in this Thursday from the local hospital in Palmerston North, it appears a young woman, 24 years old and of European descent, has given birth to a beautiful baby girl weighing in at 7lb 11oz. Tara Nicola, 24, and her husband are both of European descent yet the baby was born black. After delivery, her husband who was present at the birth, furiously asked doctors and his wife for an explanation. “I’m not a racist, I don’t care about the colour of his skin, but, have you…

Father teaches son how to drink drive

We just love a decent uplifting story here at SatireHub, and were thrilled when one of our readers shared a touching moment between a father and son he witnessed recently. “I might just be a bit of a soft-touch possibly, but my father passed away when I was young, so when I see fathers and sons bonding I get a bit misty eyed.” “When I saw a dad teaching his son how to drink and drive, I’ll admit, I shed a tear,” shared a regular reader of now-defunct sister-site StuffedNZ.com,…

Top 5 alcoholic beverages to drink while pregnant in Rotorua

With a damning and not surprising survey revealing that a startling 60% of Rotorua women consume alcohol while pregnant, it’s time to take a look at ways in which the average pregnant woman can still have a few drinks now and then without busybodies sticking their beaks in. Here’s 5 cocktails you should drink during the nine months you’re up the duff, to spare yourself the withering looks from do-gooders. 1) Purple Goanna Got doctors, friends and family telling you that you shouldn’t drink while pregnant? Throw their remarks about…

NZ weekly rent price set to increase 30% by end of this headline

THE latest news emerging from the New Zealand property and rental market suggests that due to a shortage of houses available, prices will have been driven up as much as 30% in the time it took you to read this article’s headline. The Labour government, millennials and the Salvation Army all expressed their concern, however they declined to comment on the record for fear any lengthening of the article could see further price increases. “I mean, depending on how long I ramble on about ‘current market factors’ and ‘confidence in…

Construction industry in meltdown; Bob the Builder files for insolvency

Bob the Builder, the world’s fifth-largest home builder and NZ’s premier house & land package provider, has been put into administration and rumours of liquidation are abound. SatireHub has learned the building company owes creditors and homeowners as much as $146m and hasn’t been able to renegotiate credit terms, according to documents filed in the Hamilton High Court. Bob the Builder, real name Robert Shoddybuilt, is already being pursued by investors and building supply companies arising from the disastrous, yet sexy, ‘Ready Steady Build’ project in the town of Huntly.…

Washing and reusing condoms is cost effective and great for the environment

The Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a statement to sexually-active Americans advising them to start washing and reusing condoms – because, it is not only great for saving money but it is also wonderful for the environment” In a tweet linking to condom and STD facts and statistics, the health agency wrote: “We say it because people need to start recycling” “Use one for up to 1 week of sexual intercourse,” the CDC advised. In response to the Tweet, people were commenting how they had already been doing it…

Sex-for-rent a great deal for students and travelers

A Wellington student’s mother has spoken out about a landlord offering a great sex-for-rent arrangement in the Capital. She posted on a public Facebook page ‘Vic Deals’ in December, saying her 18-year-old daughter had been “offered cheaper rent in return for ‘favours’” by the “nice and handsome” landlord at a viewing of a flat she’d found on TradeMe. University students’ associations and fringe intimacy experts agree financially vulnerable students and backpackers are the most likely victims of sex-for-rent arrangements gone awry and it can be a great deal. Sunday’s SatireHub investigation into Craigslist’s sex-for-rent market shone light…